I know i know, its been a while(again) but I’m still here. The world has truly taken on a different everything since my last post but I hope this finds you and your loved ones safe, healthy and optimistic. As of today, it’s been a little over 2 months since I’ve seen my husband. It had already been about 2 weeks with my work schedules, then the day before I was set to go see him…..๐Ÿ˜ข


I know a lot of us are not only worried about when we’ll be able to see them again, but also about their safety with Covid19 running through the prisons so rapidly. My state has a “COVID19” section on their website now so I check it every few days or so. My husband is at the facility with the most confirmed cases among prisoners and prison staff, but he’s managing. We’re doing the best we can to maintain some sense of “normalcy” in all this, so we’re making the best of emails and phone calls. When I said before that we discussed challenges that might come during his bid, we NEVERRRRRR expected a pandemic to a part of that, but I definitely give us both credit for staying in balance through all of this. We certainly miss each other, that goes without saying; this is the longest amount of time we’ve spend a part since we’ve been together but we’re not rushing it.

I’ve heard that some people in other states have started petitions and all that to get visits back up and started. For why? If anything, now is the time to maybe apply pressure to see of you can get them home(at least temporarily), not to fight to get inside the prison. Right? This virus takes on a new characteristic every week, and its only been a little less than 2 months. We have to be smart about things…and unselfish. Just like out here, there’s a population of people in prisons who are more at risk for complications if they get sick. And it may not be your loved one, but they’re somebody’s loved one and I’m sure their health and safety trumps your need to sneak touches and kisses while eating cheeseburgers from a vending machine๐Ÿคจ.

I came across a post on IG(@phiasmom95) and it was perfect:


It’s really that simple. Now is the time to be patient and creative. I’ll list a few sites below that my husband and I have used to keep busy. He’s even asked me to send him books and information on things that will help us along once he’s home. Visits, while important in these relationships allow some of us a small part of physical interaction with our loved ones, they are not (should not) be, the be all end all of these “strong impenetrable relationships” I’ve seen so many posting about. He’s not gonna forget that you exist sis, the prison isn’t going anywhere and 9.9/10 he’ll still be there when all of this is over.

I say all that to say: Go sit down somewhere and stop being extra. Practice self care, get some sleep, try a new recipe…just get comfortable while the world recovers and things get back to “normal”. You’re not the only one missing a loved one, so if staying away for a while means we all make it to the other side of this, then we have to do what we have to do.

Here’s a few creative suggestions on how you can pass the time(alone or with your loved one):

-Put extra money on the phone (if possible) Securus GTL
-Buy extra stamps and get even more familiar with JPay
-Write a poem together(we did this early in our relationship and literally mailed the paper back and forth adding to it until we felt it was a complete body of work๐Ÿคท๐Ÿพโ€โ™€๏ธ๐Ÿคท๐Ÿพโ€โ™‚๏ธ
-Pick a book(or 5) that you 2 can read together. We loved The Alchemist and Rich Dad Poor Dad as well as some other books, articles, and Islamic texts.
-Print out a quiz for both of you to take and mail each other your results, its a great way to learn about “the little things” they love (or hate) and vice versa. Plus having to wait for it to arrive in the mail adds some extra excitement because you have something to look forward to
-Send them a crossword puzzle (I’ve found some that have specific themes so you can send them ones you know they’ll enjoy

Here’s a few to start with:
Love Language Quizzes
Pinterest Quizzes
Crossword Puzzles
Word Search Puzzles